Stumblin' into Sci-Fi Saturdays

Last night i literally stumbled into another cult ~again~ when a friend and i went to see an "art show" (i live in toronto its what some people here dooooooo[??]!)

Anyway, the show was basically just a hilarious mish-mash of portraits of famous TV aliens, as well as life size robot models, homo habilis portait (w00f!) and a bunch of women clothed in body paint and sexy shoes.There was also a notable lack of Trek-inspired art at the show [opinionmaybebiased] but I did manage to find a small series of flashy portraits of Kirk and the TOS-krew. not to shit on TOS but i have more of "picard taste" in my "art shows" -- so after i was accosted by 2 or 3 coked out scientolodudes and scopped the literal dungeon (not as exciting as it sounds) i went and got poutine.

Ever nice night, eh!!!!

Send in questions for the podcasts please!!!!! anyone that wants to!! cepurquhartATgmaldotcom!

TNG - Encounter at Farpoint AKA "MEN? wtf"

Well, rebirth! Trekkie-sex-boomshakalaka! Welcome back to Trekkie Sex. Im also live-bloggin some classic eps so follow my twitter right here: MINDMELD @trekkiesex~~~;0)

Nine Point Review of Season One, Ep. 1 Encounter at Farpoint. all-aboard? Let's do this THANG!

1. Men never listen: JLP! Ya goon! Troi told you Q-dawg was smarter than you, whyd ya go sticking your wang out into the universe so forcefully???
2. FLYIN SAUCER SEPARATION ANXIETY!!!!!!
3. Did anyone else also think after the torpedos were launched and the theme song came on randomly that it was actually Q controlling youtube and remixing JLP's/our reality with the intro song to the fictional series of Star Trek TNG??????-- Oramijuststoned?
4. The late 20th Century "The Post Atomic Horror" set where JLP is put on trial kindof looks AND FEELS like BURNING MAN (seriously). Is this a good thing?
5. Is 2079 the new 2012? You heard it here first!
6. I'm stoned and live at home with my parents.
7. little person with a gong.
8. IMO JLP is the proof humanity is NOT DOOMED!

9. Do not miss that mirt!

For the record: If anyone ever approached me wearing this I would be both pleased and excited.

SPOCKROTICA

"Your bizarre sexual preferences are highly illogical."

this is a photo of me in a bathroom in Salem Mass during a real live witchy party iamnotevenkidding

TO bone or NOT to bone

TO bone or NOT to bone:

BRENTIE (as human, not android)

well hi universe, here i am in the lovely chicago, sleeping on my pals couch until 1pm everyday in a pile of my own filth and eating adderall like flinstone vitamins. i'm so glad i have a book deadline coming up that could make/break my career!!!!! as well as tons of abusive ex-esque figures in my life constantly collapsing my already fragile mental stability like a jenga skyscraper!!!! perfect, thanks be to god, im truly the pinnacle of mental health.

in other news: decided to get the hell out of New Orleans because, let's be real, the city is makes the Delta quadrant Akritiri look good by comparison. Im heading to Toronto if you wanna hang out and give me a back rub or hamster.

ROACH WOES

New Orleans is kindof the worst. I moved here to finish my book on free $ scholarship money $ so I shouldn't be bitching about it (WHITE GIRL PROBLEMS) but I can't stop myself. Did anyone know it was one of the only known earthly portals to the underworld? If you did you're a dickhead and thanks for warning me.

Dear New Orleans, there are some questions I would like to ask you. Namely, why are you obsessed with vomiting out flying cockroaches and sewer rats into my face constantly?

Nothing is preposterous here.

Examples:

• Deep fried alligator= not preposterous
• BUrrying your dead above ground= not preposterous
  
• Spending a good twenty minutes "ridding your sleeping quarters of negative voodoo energy" before sleep= not preposterous
  

One upside to being a flailing young writer in a creepy town where you have no friends is I have tons of time to update blogs. And watch the TREKKIES documentary for the bajillionth time. And eat numerous microwave dinners in single sittings not that i do that.

Trekkie Sex for NDP

This photo is the main reason why I pre-voted for the Layman:
CANADIAN POLITICS MEETS TREK
Booyakasha!

Happy Birthday Shatner

“Babies have big heads and big eyes, and tiny little bodies with tiny little arms and legs. So did the aliens at Roswell! I rest my case.” -William Shatner
(more like William Shakespeare...?)

PS Rule of thumb: if a dude you're interested in says Shatner is their "favourite captain" they are 900 times out of 10 a douche bag and also have a millions stds TRUE FACT!!!

Beam Me Up, Hottie

I was generously given a FULL CAPTAIN MEMBERSHIP to www.startrekdating.com, what a TRIP! Unfortunately I do not yet have any friends---story of my life---so join it and then send me a message that says you have a crusheroo on me okay thanks!

in other news for the last 3 weeks doctors have been trying to convince me i had hepatitis A!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (i dont, but i may as well as all i do is barf and sleep). i also got a million adderols if anyone wants to take them and stay up all night watching tng.

Bev Crushie

I'm hungover and I misss my best fronds.

To Bone Or Not To Bone: Julie Bashir

On This Weeks Edition of To Bone or Not To Bone....

Julian Bashir

on a personal note, julian bashir does kindof remind me of the two boyfriends i had (on two separate occasions) who were secretly in the closet. just saying.

TREK CASTS UP AGAIN!

some of you have been having a hard time downloading my trekcasts, so i have uploaded them to podbean for your viewing pleasure!

Click here to listen to Eppie One: The Pon Farr and Eppie Two: Bones and Boners!!!! and if you want to ask questions for the next trek cast email them to me at trekkiesex AT gmail dot com!! thanks playaz!!!

Find Your O'Hura Online

cute lil doods there

I'm a huge fan of online dating, for serious. I've seen it work a million times. My first love was found on the Internet at age 18 (NO JOKE!!!!) so when I was forwarded this link on Star Trek Online Dating i was excited.

www.startrekdating.com

by the way all i do these days is go out tanning and then come home and eat pesto sauce from the jar and then i also listen to the smiths

I need to make a Music Video ASAP

As some of you might know, I move to New Orleans in like 2 minutes to finish my book and hang out all summer for free c/o the Canadian government (thanks god, love ya!). Anyway, this means I will be in the states, and much closer to conventions, including the NASHVILLE 45TH TREK ANNIVERSARY!!!! One feature I am particularly stoked on for this con (other than the SUNDAY MORNING KLINGON BRUNCH) is the MUSIC VIDEO CONTEST> I SO WANNA MAKE ONE!!!

Rules: one music video about STAR TREK may be submitted on DVD only (please no computer-based media like CD accepted). PLEASE USE ONLY NTSC FORMAT FOR YOUR DVD. Entries are judged on the following criteria: video quality, audio quality, editing quality, inventiveness, song selection, and originality. Humorous submissions are encouraged. Entries can not be returned, and person submitting entry is granting Creation the right to play this entry in perpetuity at Creation events worldwide and/or on line at the Creation website(s). Creation does not sell music videos so your entry will never be sold as a commercial product, just presented at our events/on line.

Winners will receive a $100 gift certificate good for Creation products. Winners will be announced and certificates awarded on site; if you are not present we will mail the certificate to you so be sure to include your return address, phone number and e-mail. You may email our offices at sharon@creationent.com to confirm receipt of your entry but we do not announce winners until the event. All entries are due at Creation offices by June 30th, 2011 with no exceptions. Thanks and good luck!

Note: Due to the high volume of entries for our Music Video Contests, we are forced to limit entries to those people actually attending the specific show they are entering for. You do not have to be present for the actual showing of your video, but you must claim your award on site before the end of the weekend or your award will be forfeited.

SEND ENTRIES TO:
Creation Entertainment
STAR TREK NASHVILLE Music Video Contest
217 South Kenwood St.
Glendale, CA 91205

More Deetz: HERE!

Im going to be the Ke$ha of the federation~~~

Trekkie Sex is Back From the Dead

NuqneH, bitches! My friends have been dogging me to get posting up on this thing again. I've had a bit of a lapse in blogging that I will not get into (let's just refer to it as "a 6 month long crippling depression"), but I am crawling back into the world slowly and surely. so why the fuck not?

I had a pretty Trek-infused Valentines day this year. Above is a valentine I sent to Jesse in China. I also got the best Valentine of the century: a miniature origami Enterprise. SAY WHA???
Other winning val cards:




also, yeah I do realize it's the middle of march *whatever*.

Buy My Bike

HI guys Im selling my wicked awesome VULCAN vintage cruiser so i can buy a roadbike. also because im poor and all i eat are mcdonalds. live long and prosper.

http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/van/bik/2050119592.html

Trekkie Sex Podcast 3 Needs YOU!

HAPPY WEEN 2010!!!!!

JUST SO U KNO, IM DOING ANOTHER TREK PODCAST.

This time the theme is betazoid feelings.

RIGHT NOW MISSION:
send me ANY/ALL OF your questions about life/love/sex/trek to:
cepurquhart-AT-gmail.com PLEASE

dont know how to ask a babe out?
have strange feelings for someone of a higher rank?
tribble fetish?

In other news: the thing that I recently shoplifted was sleeping pills from a health food store
WHOOPS

dont you dare judge me.

Halloween Fail

So, the only thing I hate more than myself this week is MY ENTIRE LIFE. This is how bad of a week it has been. If you were ever considering sending me fan mail to tell me you think Im great or a babe or have nice sweaterdogz THIS WOULD BE THE WEEK.

Ive been shopping all day for a belt in order to "spice up" my halloween costume, which (obviously) will just be Sexy Trekkie. Again. Im like that sad clown that people hire for a kids birthday parties because the bouncy castle was too expensive.

I actually just prepared a timeline of the decline of my trekkie outfit through the years then realized posting breast-centric photos of you year after year in the same outfit is depressing. So instead enjoy this photo of some skank who obviously has never seen a tribble in her life. Not that I have.

In other news, I've taken up an old hobby: pornography. Also, shoplifting. But more on that later. Bye!

Babies Again

Its saturday night and I just ate two bags of chips and I hate my life! In other news, who can complain with this dudes? They are sending my ovaries into a spasm. Bye.

Best Craigslist Ad Ever, Part II

Ok, I take it back. This might actually be the best Trek related Craigslist ad in the universe forever. The things one could "do" with this guy? Just saying...

Life Sized Locutus of Borg Star Trek Replica - $4500

"Rare "Number 006" of a limited edition of 500 made from a lifecast of Patrick Stewart (Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise) provided by Michael Westmore. This life-size replica of Locutus of Borg from "Star Trek: The Next Generation" stands nearly 8 feet tall (approximately 6-foot tall Borg with 2-foot tall base) and commands a powerful presence. The face is extremely life-like, the body is detailed and in excellent condition, and the base is superb. A true quality collectible that is part of "Star Trek" lore and TV history! The body is made from latex that is filled with foam, and the base is made of fiberglas. The figure incorporates make-up designed by Michael Westmore and costume designed by Robert Blackman, and the inscribed plaque features engraved signatures of these two artists as well as the Paramount logo and Starfleet insignia. Shipping must be arranged by the buyer."